Behind the hospital walls

So Melanie made me hold off giving the full hospital story until things calmed down and everyone was aware that both Ona and Melanie were happy and healthy after their stint in the “hospital”. In truth, it is not a hospital but a tropical medical center. Knowing that LBJ does not try to be a hospital, but instead is a glorified med. center doesn’t really help though. Especially when you live here and you are aware that there is no real hospital and this is the best we have.Let’s start with the chickens. I have written previously about my own personal war with the chickens on island. Strangely, LBJ has embraced them. I have often found it humerous when driving past the hospital and you see 3-4 chickens hanging around the emergency department entrance. The orderly holding the door open for the chicken takes the cake though. The girl in the photo below dropped more bongos (Australian cheese puff-like snack) on the ground than made it in her mouth. This well meaning orderly held the door open so that the chicken could clean up the spilled snacks. Priceless. In an age old bad joke, we ask “Why did the chicken cross the road?”…..In American Samoa it is to get to the ambulances. Oh, of course. Why didn’t you think of that? Moving on… we now come to toads. Does anyone else find it strange to have 5 times the number of hospital staff in marine toads croaking outside the maternity ward? Curiousity got the better of me. I counted the toads. 34 toads were hanging out by Melanie’s room. Actually I found the toads somewhat reassuring as I was getting eaten alive by mosquitoes in Melanie’s hospital room. Anything that might reduce my chances of getting elephantitis is okay by me.

What more could there be….? Well discounting the fact that they never finished the ceilings in the hospital; what else do you notice about the photo below? Yup, that is a cat running down the hall. I am pretty willing to bet that none of you have seen a cat running down a hospital corridor. Why the cat? Well to eat the rats of course. Silly question.

Why the rats? What else would be willing to eat this? Actually, to be fair, the hospital is known for being one of the better places to eat on the island. Ah, hospital food. “Mommy, mommy, Can we go eat at the hospital?” That’s an age-old question, right?

When you think of maternity wards, do you think of these guys with weed-wackers outside your room? So much for a well needed rest.So it is not a stateside (mainland as we islanders call it) hospital, but we had some great people looking out for Melanie and Ona. Carol even got to put in an IV for Melanie since the nurse at LBJ wasn’t comfortable doing it. From what I hear it caused quite the stir as other LBJ staff wanted to come look at her handi-work. Can you imagine someone off the street saying to the nursing staff “Do you want me to do that procedure for you?” No?

I have to say it was quite a deal though. Melanie’s hospital tab after delivery by emergency c-section, medications, 4 day hospital stay, etc…. $150. Yup, $150. So I suppose you get what you pay for. We got excellent care and a wonderful new edition to the Brown family to show for it. Worth every penny.